Fake It Till You Make It (Bad Advice)

I will never concede that you are right; I will defend my integrity until I die. [Job 27.5] 

On this date in 2015, I wrote the article Integrity Is Transparent and Humble. It makes a good point.

The fact is recorded, Job did not as he claimed defend his integrity until he died. When God finally accosted Job in chapter 38, Job changed his proud stance and repented.

Pride is a damnable thing. As I read Job's story, I find myself nowhere near as good a person as Job. And yet, like Job, I still think I don't deserve the difficulties in my life. Imagine that.

In my defense, I say "I trust in Jesus" for the desired redemption. But my suffering continues...

Is my declaration of "faith in Jesus" just as much a proud argument as Job's claim to integrity? 

When my circumstances remain unchanged in "loss" and "ill health," should I insist, like Job, that I am innocent (even "in Christ")? A pastor once said, "Fake it till you make it..." regarding declaration of faith, but isn't that exactly what Job was doing for which he got severely rebuked?

How is Job's confessing his innocence in works and me confessing my innocence in faith any different if circumstances remain unchanged?

Just because Job said "I have integrity" doesn't mean he had integrity. Just because I say "I have faith" doesn't mean I have faith. Like Job, I don't know all that is taking place in the heavenly court - but I do know this: I am experiencing loss and ill health and I would very much like relief. Job's declaration of integrity did him no more good than my declaration of faith has done to this point.

Unlike Job, I understand that I don't deserve any good thing from God. I "say" instead that I trust in Jesus. But still, my circumstances persist... 

If God stepped into my room just now, would He agree that I indeed have faith  as I claim and apologize to me that it took so long for my circumstances to change? I think not. I think if God stepped into my room right now, He would rebuke me for defending my faith when my faith couldn't move a b-b across a flat surface, let alone, move a mountain.

What if, when God confronted Job, that Job ridiculously responded, "No, I will continue to defend my integrity..."? But isn't that exactly what we do when God's Word says "Your faith will move mountains" and we continue to defend our mountain-moving-less faith? Are we not in blind pride defending ourselves to declare "I DO believe!" when nothing comes of our faith?

God IS in my room right now - I have His very Word right in front of me! And, His Word says, "Where is your faith?"

Will I follow Job's example of humility and repentance, or will I insist on powerlessly "faking it till I make it"?

Father, I have proudly insisted "I have faith" when, like Job, I need to just shut my mouth in humble repentance. I am nothing—how could I ever find the answers? I will cover my mouth with my hand. I have said too much already. I have nothing more to say. I know that you can do anything, and no one can stop you. You asked, ‘Who is this that questions my wisdom with such ignorance?’ It is I—and I was talking about things I knew nothing about, things far too wonderful for me. You said, ‘Listen and I will speak! I have some questions for you, and you must answer them.’ I had only heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said (all my shallow, albeit proud faith claims), and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance.”